THE OTHER SIDE OF TheOtherRoom

THE OTHER SIDE OF TheOtherRoom: making a case for Mr. President

 

***NB: For the purpose of this article, I’ve described the home (as a whole) as TheOtherRoom…***

INTRO: What are the major problems facing us as a nation today? Militancy, Insurgency, Kidnapping, Bad & selfish leadership, Crime & Corruption, religious and ethnic conflicts, …bla…bla…bla - Note that all the problems are traceable to one root cause; FAULTY MORAL VALUES!

I write today as a young man born in the 80s. Let’s take a close look at some of the parents of the 50s/60s. They hardly had any form of formal education, but they raised our parents and instilled in them, high moral values & standards. Some of our parents had a bit of education (and career ambitions – which they pursued). With this ‘distraction’, they raised us. Look at how we’ve turned out; definitely not as morally sound as our parents, but then, compared to the generation of teenagers coming closely behind us, we can be rightfully considered to be complete saints; due respect to the few exceptions among them.

I’m not trying to demean any generation of parents (or children). It’s just an observation of the trend. Due to no one’s fault in particular, it’s obvious from this analysis that the more time parents (mothers in particular) spend away from TheOtherRoom pursuing education and lofty careers, the worse the corresponding generation of children they raise turn out.

Even though you may want to argue otherwise, let’s face it, ultimately, the man is the provider (1Tim.5:8), the woman is the home-maker (Titus2:4-5, 1Tim5:14) …and that’s the way the family was designed to operate (by God). This is not to say the man doesn’t have a role to play in homemaking, likewise the woman, in providing. As a matter of fact, I CANNOT marry a woman who’s not willing and ready to bring anything to the table as far as providing is concerned.

Now, back to the issue of the problems we’re facing as a country, there’s a growing need for a stronger society, but it’s not possible to have a stronger society without stronger homes. And truth be told, it’s impossible to have strong homes without committed and available homemakers (mothers).

...as such, here is my submission; inasmuch as the woman has a vital role to play in the workplace, in politics, and in nation-building, and all, I think she has an equally important task in shaping the nation by raising the next generation with the right values… As a matter of fact, her first and primary assignment is to lay the right foundation for the upbringing of the next generation… and that can only happen if she spends a bit more time taking care of business in #TheOtherRoom!

God Bless Nigeria!

OPEN LETTER TO MY UNBORN KIDS; LitTLe krAzy and his sister

                                                                                                              Apr. 18, 2016

Dear priNce & priNCesS of the krAzy empire,

Hope you guys are doing fine with 'bros J' & co. on that side. In celebration of this year's ‪#‎WorldkrAzyDay‬ which is only 2days away, I thought to reach out to you as pertaining some important issues.

Firstly, this is not a very good time to cross you over to this side as there's no light in my current location. And the heat? I'm sure God must be preparing a special 'hell fire' for sinners from this side - cos we all are used to heat already and the current hell might not be much of a punishment anymore...(just saying). Anyway, I have a generator (4 gen-sets, actually) to combat this problem, but there's no fuel to power them.

Secondly, I wouldn't want you to get here and grow up taking Pap (Ògì/Akanmu) like I did when I was growing up. There are alternatives oo, but then, they are very expensive right now because of one dullard ...sorry, Dollar.

That said, I know I'm only on this side but my supply is from your end. 'Bros J' has always been responsible for that. As such, the two issues raised above are not the main reasons for the delay in crossing you over.

Actually, I've been ready for a while now (or rather, somehow ready sha) but the MAJOR reason for the delay is that we have been looking for your mother up & down for a long time now. Rumour has it that she's still doing 'chic' and playing hard-2-get.

We have sent out several search parties to look for her without success. I have personally attended countless weddings (& instead of concentrating on my job as the MC of the wedding, I keep checking out the chief bridesmaid and bridal train) all in search of your mum.

I looked through the FACES on FACEbook.
Tweeted at the sisTERs on tweeTER.
Said WHAT'S UP to the babes on WhatsApp.
I followed every ESTHER on INSTA-GRAM to be my maDAM...
...& even decided TO GO to 2go...all to no avail.

Look! If you can influence things from that side, tell 'Bros J' to tell your mum to calm down with this hide-&-seek she's been playing with me ooo. It's in your best interest that you do that... because by the time you get here and your 'mates' are in primary 2 when you're just getting into nursery 1, it will be on record that I tried my best. It's not my fault.

I have to go now. I need to go and continue the search. In fact, one babe just passed now. Make I go check whether na your mama be that.

Don't worry, I'll write you again to give you situation reports.

Yours in the krAzy Kingdom

smiLe;JesusLuvsYou...krAzy®

YOU'RE NOT A BIG MAN (Pt 2)

Over the weekend, I got outta town with a group and happened to share my hotel room with a young man who was also part of the trip. After settling in, we got talking about life in general. He’s a driver attached to one of the bosses of a finance house based in Lagos. During the discussion, he eventually disclosed his salary to me & I instantly felt sorry for myself.

"His salary is 4times my salary" …sorry; “his salary is my salary multiplied by 4”. I mean, “my salary is a quarter of his”. If you still don’t get it, what I’m saying is that “my 4-month take home (as the “Superstar OAP”) is what he gets monthly (as a driver)”. Na wa oooo. Me sef sabi drive nau.

…& I have a BSc and some other professional certificate jargons as well.. Not even sure he has any of those. 

Well, my point is, “being a driver / cook / security man (& the likes) is not always as bad as we think".

Let’s simply call this write-up, “You’re Not A Big Man (Pt 2). If you missed Part 1, you can read it here: http://bit.ly/1oWBGPU & kindly watch this space for my next write-up which drops next week. This time around, it’s an open letter (not to the government! Not to any politician! Not to any entertainer! Not even to God! In short, it’s not to anyone alive at the moment!) “then who?”, you might wanna ask. Well, you’d have to wait and see.

God bless you and yours! wink emoticon

By the way, if you find any ‘lucrative’ job opening for a driver, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me. I CAN DRIVE TOO.
smile emoticon

2016: My year of ‪#‎SmallHustle_PlentyMoney‬!
smiLe;JesusLuvsYou…krAzy

YOU'RE NOT A BIG MAN!

I don't have to tell you how much I earn...but I know quite a number of people who I'm 'supposedly' bigger than; but, earn much more than I earn. 

My 'vulcanizer' who fixes my tyres does so & gets about N200/N250 per visit to him. If he does about 10/15 cars in a day, he gets between N2000 & N3750 daily. Working 25days a month, he makes between N50000 & N93750 monthly. 

HOW MUCH IS YOUR SALARY?

My mechanic touches a few spots on my vehicle and gets a minimum 3-5k as workmanship (that's aside inflated bills he gives me for spare parts). If he's good enough and works about 4 vehicles a day, that's average of 16k per day & 400k a month (25 working days).
HOW MUCH IS YOUR SALARY?

Let's put the average Lagos trip by public transport at N100. Fourteen (14) passengers (Twenty-two for the bigger buses) amounts to N1,400 (or N2,200) per trip...(let's ignore the ones who come in after some passengers have alighted). The average bus driver should be able to do a minimum of 10trips a day. That's N14,000 (or 22,000) daily & N350,000 (or N550,000) monthly. Even if expenses like fuel, car maintenance, 'daily deliver' (for those who don't own the vehicles) + the 'Almighty street urchins' (Agbèròs) gulp half of that sum, it still leaves the driver and his conductor with N175,000 monthly (or N275,000 for the bigger buses).
HOW MUCH IS YOUR SALARY?

The 'Agbèrò' himself at the bus stop is not left out. He collects about N100 from each bus (let's say 100buses) &I hear them say things like, "Owó àárò', "Owó Òsán" & "Owó alé - which translates, "Morning money", "Afternoon money", & "night money" respectively. That's a sizeable N30,000 daily & N750,000 in 25days. Ok, I hear that these ones share the money with some Bàbá Ìsàlès (Area Fadas). Even at that, N750,000 monthly is not a small something.
HOW MUCH IS YOUR SALARY?

Even my gateman whose job is to open and close my gate for me when I'm going out (& coming in) is a BIG MAN. Cos without having to worry about too much packaging -spending so much on designer clothes- like I do...without having to spend more than half of his income on transport like I do... without some 'meaningless expenses' that the 'office-man' incures..., he gets free accommodation + 1 free meal per day and 15k. Hmmmmm!
HOW MUCH IS YOUR SALARY?


Don't forget that all these guys -except the gateman- don't have bosses they're answerable to.
That means; they don't have plenty office palava to deal with. They don't have office politics to contend with. And most importantly, they can choose the day (& time) they want to go to work. My broda (sista), ONLY A BIG MAN CAN DO THIS!
If you think you are, I dare you not to go to work this morning. tongue emoticon tongue emoticon

               *** *** ***

I think I've made my point. I don't know of a perfect way to end this write-up but three things coming to mind right now:

1. There's no small job anywhere. Whatever your hands find to do, pls do with ALL your might.

2. You can continue to play the BIG MAN but as for me, I've made up my mind. The next time I pump my tyres at my 'Vulcanizers', I'd simply (& humbly) ask him, "Bros, anything for the boys"?

3. What's your perfect title for this write-up? I want to keep it in my archives.

Oya, babai. Pls, go to work, Mr. BigMan. tongue emoticon

2016: My year of ‪#‎SmallHustle_PlentyMoney‬!
smiLe;JesusLuvsYou...krAzy®

My 2015 End-Of-Year Message

Hi, my name is Oshin Oluwatosin.

Fans call me 'priNce'...

Friends (& Family) call me krAzy.

I'M AN ACTOR

I'M A COMEDIAN

I'M A PRESENTER

I'M AN EMCEE

I'M A HIGHLY EXPERIENCED EVENT COMPERE (well over a century career events/Wedding Receptions nor be joke)

YES! 'I BE EMU CEE' (MC)

I'M AN ENTERTAINMENT CONSULTANT (even though I don't know what that means...It just sounds like something I can do) smile emoticon

I'M A RED-CARPET HOST

I'M AN EVENT MANAGER

I'M A MOVIE PRODUCER

I'M A DIRECTOR -both for stage & screen

I'M ALSO INTO 'GENERAL EVERY-EVERY' (meaning I can do anything legitimate; as long as you can pay for the service)...

TO THOSE WHO ENGAGED MY SERVICES THIS YEAR: A very massive 'ThankYou' to you.

TO THOSE WHO ARE STILL OWING FOR SERVICE RENDERED: God is watching you in 3D.

...& TO THOSE WHO DIDN'T ENGAGE MY SERVICE AT ALL: you're totally forgiven. I'm just going to assume you didn't know the services I render...BUT NOW YOU KNOW. Let 2016 be different. It's gonna be a year of ‪#‎SmallHustle_PlentyMoney for us!

God bless you, fam'.

smiLe;JesusLuvsYou...krAzy®